fashion, lifestyle

Overcoming your fears

Have you ever been so afraid of failing at something that you decided not to try it at all? Or has a fear of failure meant that, subconsciously, you undermined your own efforts to avoid the possibility of a larger failure?

Many of us have probably experienced this at one time or another. The fear of failing can be immobilizing – it can cause us to do nothing, and therefore resist moving forward. But when we allow fear to stop our forward progress in life, we’re likely to miss some great opportunities along the way.

Signs that you’re are afraid to fail 

  1. A reluctance to try new things or get involved in challenging projects.
  2. Self-sabotage Add to My Personal Learning Plan – for example, procrastination, excessive anxiety Add to My Personal Learning Plan, or a failure to follow through with goals.
  3. Low self-esteem or self-confidence Add to My Personal Learning Plan – commonly using negative statements such as “I’ll never be good enough to get that promotion,” or “I’m not smart enough to get on that team.”
  4. Perfectionism Add to My Personal Learning Plan – A willingness to try only those things that you know you’ll finish perfectly and successfully.

How do we overcome that fear?

  1. Learn to think more positively – Positive thinking is an incredibly powerful way to build self-confidence and neutralize self-sabotage. 
  2. Look at the worse-case scenario – In some cases, the worst case scenario may be genuinely disastrous, and it may be perfectly rational to fear failure. In other cases, however, this worst case may actually not be that bad, and recognizing this can help.
  3. Have a contingency plan Add to My Personal Learning Plan – If you’re afraid of failing at something, having a “Plan B” in place can help you feel more confident about moving forward.
  4. Leave the thoughts of the world Add to my personal learning plan  – Actually in this generation this is our biggest fear. What would the world think? What would my friends say? Will they see me as less cool or up to standard?? Leave that drive alone because all it would do it suck up your time and leave you on the same spot.

Most of us will stumble and fall in life. Doors will get slammed in our faces, and we might make some bad decisions. But imagine if Michael Jordan had given up on his dream to play basketball when he was cut from that team. Imagine if Richard Branson had listened to the people who told him he’d never do anything worthwhile without a high school diploma.

Think of the opportunities you’ll miss if you let your failures stop you.

All these being said I hope I’ve been able to motivate sombody out there with this post. It’s been a long time no lifestyle post so I decided to write something worth a read and turning point for you all. 




Abstract Print dress (shop here)

Ego coloured Perspex (shop here)
Zara Bag oldie 

Use discount code “ShewaJay” to get 15% off when you checkout at myfabcloset.co.uk

I’m also hosting a giveaway on my Instagram page , if you love the dress I’m wearing and want an opportunity to win a £70 gift voucher to buy yourself one , check rules on my Instagram page shewa_jay to find out more. 

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19 thoughts on “Overcoming your fears”

  1. Being positive can be difficult sometimes but its worth pursuing! You look beautiful in this dress. I love the picture of u looking at the flower- your eyes are gorgeous! x x x

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    1. Okay let’s go about it this way. You’d need to first stop thinking positivity is difficult, next make a conscious effort to keep negativity out. Try it for some time And see how it goes.

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  2. You Hit the spot with this post.
    Mine is perfectionism, if I don’t see things turning out the way I want them, I usually don’t start! Projects I was supposed to start 3 years ago, I postponed searching for the perfect time and conditions to start.
    I have lost so much due to fear.

    But I think I’m mastering fear now, I use it as a motivation theses days, right now I’m a great risk taker, since I tried it the first time I haven’t looked back (of course I take calculated risks).
    I use my fear of not becoming something significant or making an impact in this world to get me moving (that’s my biggest fear, even bigger than death!).

    I love your dress btw! You look absolutely stunning!! 😍😍🔥

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    1. Deji this is so me! I totally agree with you on the fear of not becoming significant being the biggest fear. Before I started blogging 2 years ago, I was always making excuses on how I didn’t own a camera , I didn’t have a wide reach on social media, I was scared my friends might mock me, but I wake up today and I’m thankful I didn’t let that fear overwhelm me! Thank you for always stopping by !

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Thank you for this post shewa! This is what I preach always intentional living…Life is already difficult but if we decide to keep our confessions and belief despite all odds then definitely fear has no place…Well done darling ..lifestyle posts are the truth…

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